Page 14 - Mainstreamer e-Magazine 01 June 2022 - Final (4)

NEEDN’T FRET
Embrace the Challenge and Reborn

Hamidah
Hassan

am a paraplegic with injuries at levels T10 to L2 remove it to prevent it from becoming worse.
of my spine. I was diagnosed with a That’s what they said.
I tumour in my spine when I was 17 years old. I
underwent an operation to remove the I never imagined that one day I would change
tumour twice. The first one was immediately after from an active and extrovert person, to
the diagnosis, and the second one was when I a disabled person. It never came across my mind
was 21, during my second year of my Bachelor’s that I would be a person with a disability
degree program at the University of Malaya, Kuala and a paraplegic.
Lumpur. It was a tragedy and changed my whole This totally changed my life. I underwent
life. rehabilitation, and I had my physiotherapy. I was

I woke up one morning and tried my very best advised to use special callipers and to have a
to feel my legs. I wondered if they were continuous exercise program on my own.
still there, attached to my lower body. I was hoping Facing this situation during my campus life, I
that I could stand on my feet and walk, similar to had to take a study leave for a year, as I was
what I experienced after the first operation. admitted to the hospital for the whole semester. I

I waited and waited. I felt numb; I was not able missed my exam in the first semester and had to
to feel anything. My sister and brother go back to my hometown to continue my therapy
were next to me. I was traumatized. I asked them and treatment. Eager to be as “normal” as before,
where my legs were. They tried to comfort me my family and I tried many alternative treatments
with speechless faces. They had to answer that my as well. I burnt both my feet during a steam
legs were still there. treatment with natural plants and my skin became
infected. My family felt so sorry for me. They tried
At that very moment, I felt like it was the end very hard to make me be “me” again.
the doctor who operated on me the most. He was “
of my life. All my ambitions were gone. I would
not be able to achieve anything in my life with this
condition. I cried and cried until I
lost my voice, and I hated everyone who was
I met a few students with disabilities
involved in the whole treatment. I hated
on campus. Some were blind, and
the one responsible for the unsuccessful operation, others had physical disabilities
unlike the previous doctor during my first one. I with varied categories. It boosted
was so frustrated and depressed and felt all kinds me. Never give up and practice
of negativity trapped within me.
continuously to be positive.”
I became paraplegic due to the second
operation. After the doctor diagnosed 23 years ago, it was not as digital as it is now.
that I had a benign tumour in my spine, he There was very limited access to all the information
mentioned an operation was the best option to needed. I could only get some resources through

13 Vol. 01, Issue 1 | June 2022